If I tell you a secret, do you promise you’ll still
like me anyway? Ok, here goes. Deep breath…I am not crafty.
Ok, so that's not really a big deal. Lots of people aren't crafty. But here's the kicker. Even though I kind of act like I want to be, I don’t actually think I
do. Or at least not enough to really put the effort in. There it
is. Out in the open. I’m the one mom of a toddler out there who, in
her heart of hearts, just really doesn’t care much for art projects on weekends
or turning bottles into anything other than noisemakers at the bottom of the
trash can. I don't even love to finger paint with my 2 year old. Nope.
I’m a bit envious of the women out there that are making
card stock banners for birthday parties and cupcakes that look like their
children’s favorite characters. And don’t even get me started on all of
you that can sew! You women amaze me. Homemade blankets, clothes
for dolls, burp clothes and countless other things that make up a wanna-be DIYer’s
daydreams. But it’s just not me. Or at least, I’m not willing to put the time
in to make it me.
I made a cardstock banner once. For my sister’s Bridal
Shower. I sat down the night before (because that’s when all us
non-crafters sit down to do things like this) and pulled out all the decorative
paper I had and started trying to choose the colors and patterns that would go
together. About 15 minutes into that task, the fun started to fade.
And I hadn’t even begun to cut, write the letters or stamp the frilly designs on
anything.
Next I had to start cutting the paper to make the stackable
sheets. I swear I measured right. I know for a fact I was counting
those little lines like I was supposed to. But dang it if that stupid
paper came out in different sizes! It was at this point that I started
muttering, “I hate this crap” under my breath. Or right out loud.
Whatever.
About an hour into a project that would take a regular
person 30 minutes, there were so many scraps on the floor that it looked like
NYC just after the ball drops on New Years. I think I had thrown
that piece-of-junk cutter at least three times while yelling, “see! This
is why I don’t do this kind of stuff! This is why other people do this
crap!” And I can tell you that I did not use the words “stuff” or
“crap.” But, you know, I’m keeping it PG for you. Eventually, about
two letters in to a five letter word, I looked at my husband (who had been
sitting on the couch not hiding his laughter well) and said, “I don’t want to
do this anymore.”
But I did. And the end result was good. So good,
in fact, that when I told me sister I made it her response was, “You
made this?!” See, she knows. THIS is not my deal. I do
not make things. I took her shock as the highest form of flattery.
And if she ever throws that thing away I just might cry.
I blame this want of craftiness on Pinterest. It’s
hard not to get caught up in all the awesomeness that it throws at me
daily. Pin upon pin of party, holiday, home décor and kid’s project ideas that
make me wish I had a house complete with a craft nook (I made myself, of
course) for all the crafting I will do. But really, all it would have is
a computer on it and maybe a file with a nice printed label that says “future
projects.” It may or may not be empty. Computer ink it
pricey, after all.
There are moms out there that are great at all of
this. Which is a giant feat in itself because just being a woman is an
existence with many hats. When you throw in the fact that many of us are
moms, the number of hats goes up. So, can you please tell me how these
ladies have the time (or desire) to do all they do?
I mean, just check out their kids’ birthday parties.
They are not the birthday parties of our youths. These things take some
serious planning, prep-work and diligent crafting. Most of them have
party favors now. And we’re not talking your run-of-the-mill goody
bag. These moms are going all out and making adorable treats and gifts
for the pint-size party hopper. They are coming up with awesome themes
and they are carrying them out from the moment you step in until the second you
leave. Their cakes look like works of art and you probably feel
like you’ve walked into a living, breathing version of Pinterest.
For the record, Jack’s cake came from Walmart and we put a
big, plastic picture of Mickey on the front door. He was happy with
it. So was I, seeing as I didn’t have to make a banner. But I
didn’t do it that way to prove a point or take a stand. I did it that way
because the night before people were supposed to come I said, “Oh man, I better
get something to make it look like we’re having a party!” See, I don’t
have the gene. I know I pinned things for a party. But that’s as
far as it went. Sometimes it’s not just the thought that counts.
You have to actually do something with those thoughts. Or else they’re
just nice ideas. And they don’t really count for squat.
Ultimately, I’m just really thankful that my child is in a
really good school that does fun stuff with him all the time and helps him
learn. And I’m thankful for crafty friends and a sister than can make
anything. Until I find my crafty gene (if I ever decide to really look
for it) I think I will just keep sending my pins to them.
And to all you crafty moms that walk through life, craft
flag flying high; a tip of my hat to you. All my hats. Rock on,
with your crafty-selves! (Now, can you make something for me? I’ve
got a set of three Frappuccino bottles that I’ve been saving since last fall that
still need to be painted for a Christmas craft. Takers?)
